


The Poetry Incident, or, How Soundwave Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Megatron

by Jack_R



Category: Transformers - All Media Types, Transformers Generation One
Genre: (none of them could seduce a trashcan if they tried), (that's irony), Bad Decisions, Denial, Other, Poetry Kink, Seduction, minor Optimus Prime/Ratchet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-13
Updated: 2018-02-13
Packaged: 2019-03-17 23:07:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,605
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13669197
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jack_R/pseuds/Jack_R
Summary: "This is never going to work," said Ravage.Soundwave ignored him.





	The Poetry Incident, or, How Soundwave Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Megatron

**Author's Note:**

> Everyone should embrace the fact that G1 Decepticons are gloriously Dumb and completely incompetent at absolutely everything they do, and then love it as much as I do.
> 
> I mostly based Soundwave on the Prime-verse for completely self-indulgent reasons.

 

 

"This is never going to work," said Ravage.

Soundwave ignored him.

"I mean that," Ravage continued. "I mean, I've heard my share of bad ideas, but _this_ has got to be in the top ten."

Soundwave gave no sign of having heard the casseticon's opinion. Instead, he turned around and headed for the energon dispenser.

Ravage remained undeterred.

"How do you even expect this to go?" he asked, padding along his host. "Come on, enlighten me. I am morbidly curious."

Laserbeak, lazily perched on Soundwave's servo, chirped in agreement. Soundwave in turn glared at the casseticon.

"See, _even she_ thinks I'm right," said Ravage. "And you have to admit, Laserbeak here isn't the brightest diode in the circuit."

Laserbeak took offense to that and hooted.

"It's okay, Beaky, not all of us can be as smart as Soundwave here," Ravage assured her. "Take me, for example. I haven't got the slightest idea how he thinks this is going to end up as anything but _an unmitigated disaster._ "

Soundwave smashed the energon dispenser with more force than was strictly necessary. Laserbeak twitched.

"Careful with that emotions programming," said Ravage. "Perhaps you should just delete it. _Like you obviously deleted your logic modules."_

Laserbeak chipped sympathetically.

"Let's look at it from the bright side, though," Ravage said, helping himself to some energon as well. "At least you aren't so obvious about it as Starscream," he paused, thoughtfully. "Well. To be fair, it would be pretty hard to top that. Poor Screamer is practically throwing himself at him with his ports flailing open."

Soundwave froze and one of his datacables slowly came down, menacingly cackling with electricity. Laserbeak chirruped in warning.

"Primus, no need to get defensive," said Ravage. "It's not like our esteemed leader is going to let _anyone_ into his processor. Shame, though," he continued, licking a bit of the energon. "Bet it must be nice. And _big,_ " he run his glossa across his mouth plate. "Why, Hook sneaked a peek during the last medical and he said that his channel capacity must be out of this world."

Soundwave didn't answer.

Instead, he electrocuted him.

Laserbeak watched her fellow casseticons crumble on the ground. After a few seconds, she chirped. It sounded vaguely worried.

Soundwave left his screen intentionally blank, but he prodded Ravage's unconscious body with one datacable. It sparkled a bit. The felinoid garbled.

Ratbat, up until that point quiet, shrugged.

"Well," he said with no sympathy, "he had it coming."

Laserbeak trilled.

 

\---

 

The problem was, Ravage was right.

Well. That perhaps wasn't _entirely_ true. Ravage was not wrong, but he also wasn't completely right. Soundwave knew that. Or at least, he hoped.

For once, he was absolutely not _obvious_ about it. That was reserved for idiots like Starscream, who pranced around the base preening and flaunting his various assets, seemingly having lost all remaining sense. Not that all that strutting and showing off did him any good, mind you. At this point, Soundwave was starting to believe that their Lord would still not get the hint even if the Air Commander straight up marched to him and asked him to plug it in.

On one hand, that was good. Great, even. Starscream was not getting into Megatron's ports anytime soon.

On the other hand, neither was Soundwave.

Not that he _wanted_ anything as _crude_ as that, of course! Soundwave was a very sophisticated bot, after all. His loyalty was first and foremost to Lord Megatron and the Decepticon cause, unlikely _some Seekers_ he could name, and he would never swoop as low as to prioritise his own—needs—or even consider using their relationship for his own gain. Yes, Lord Megatron was— _aesthetically pleasing_ —and he could _appreciate_ that, but he chose to serve him because he admired their leader for who he was: and not because he simply wanted something from him.

That, in fact, might have been the problem.

If it was the interfacing he was after, it would be something entirely different. After all, there were many bots on the base, and Soundwave was quite confident that if he wished to, he could manage to find someone to satisfy that particular need. Neither it was about getting something from his Lord—he was completely satisfied with his position in the command, was reasonably confident in his own competency: and he knew Megatron appreciated and valued him.

No—as far a Soundwave knew, it started with the poems.

 

\---

 

"He's dead," said Frenzy.

"He's deader than Soundwave's personality," Rumble said.

"He's gone," Frenzy concurred.

"Practically in a smelting pit," Rumble agreed.

"Deceased."

"Offline."

"Stiff."

"Expired."

"Dead."

“Deader.”

"The deadest."

Both minicons gazed at each other solemnly: then they burst out laughing.

" _Hilarious,_ you two," drawled Ravage. "I'm awed by your subtle metaphors and ingenious use of language. Really, well done."

"Chill there, big boy," said Rumble.

"Yeah," repeated Frenzy. "Chill. We are just tellin' the truth."

"Energon is expensive, Soundwave deleted his humour module, and _this guy,_ " said Rumble and pointed at bot on the datapad, "is absolutely fragging dead."

Ravage glanced at the bot's face with little interest.

"That's possible," he said. "But I am finding a bit hard to understand why you seem to think it's funny. That poor fragger will probably end up in a smelting pit, sure, but you don't see me laughing my aft off at the notion."

Frenzy shrugged.

"Should know better than to open his mouth like that," he said.

"Yes, maybe," said Ravage. "But he doesn't. He tries to—do something, I don't know. Change things. And sure, it's idiotic and absolutely futile, but at least he tries. And for all his effort, he's just going to end up offlined with _morons_ like you laughing at him. That's not funny. That is just sad."

Rumble opened his mouth and then he closed it again.

"We're not morons," Frenzy said after a second.

"Could have fooled me," sneered Ravage. He turned his head in clear dismissal and lay down.

Soundwave finished fixing up his servo—or, at least, trying to fix it, he was no medic—and looked up in curiosity at the two sullen minicons.

" _This guy_?" he played a recording of Rumble's voice and tilted his head.

"Oh, that. He calls himself Megatron, I've heard," Rumble said, and handed over the datapad. "He writes—essays, mostly. Treatises. Some poems. Whatever. The Senate's already onto him. He's as good as dead."

Soundwave briefly scanned the pad. Then he paused, and went over it again.

"Oh, he's a pretty one alright," Frenzy smirked when he noticed Soundvawe's interest. "Not that anyone up there will care about it, but still. Shame."

Soundwave lifted his head from the datapad and glared at him.

"But you wouldn't care about something like that, of course!" Rumble hurried to say and quickly took the datapad. "We all know that, Boss, sure thing. Here, let me help—you'll be more interested in that, I think. The stuff he writes," he said, reaching back to Soundwave and the datapad displaying lines of text.

Soundwave took it without a comment, quickly scanning the lines.

 _'A prison full of willing prisoners,'_  as if he didn't know that, _'a prisoner within a system, prisoner within your own body and the Senate holds the key,_ ' and didn't Soundwave learn that well enough on his own? That was nothing new to him—he read on, though, morbidly curious about what this poor bot though was important enough to write even though they would offline him for it.

_'I say enough. Reject your work, reject your alt-mode. Resist the system. And your 'betters'? You have none. We are all equals. And we have a right to decide how to live our lives.'_

And he was right, wasn't he? Not that it would matter, Rumble was right. If the Senate noticed him—and of course they would, Soundwave knew that better than most—he was as good as dead.

Still.

He scrolled down, and it was there, hundreds and thousands of words, and every single of them bad enough to be offed for and all of them ringing true in a crystal clear way. He found himself aching as he sifted through treatises and essays and tracts, each and every sentence hitting a bit closer to his core, and he thought about the bot—Megatron—who couldn't possibly not know what would happen to him for daring to write this. It wasn't just a protest or an objection to their very way of living, no: it was an outright call for a revolution.

But it wasn’t the treatises that brought him to a halt.

It was the poems.

 _"They made me to_  
_wander through the dark and_  
_find things_  
_others can't._  
_Bring them to the light._

  
_So this is what I found:_

  
_The inconvenient ones._  
_Too big or too small for the places_  
_they gave them._  
_The old ones._  
_Used and forgotten by those_  
_who broke them._  
_The unlucky ones._  
_Made to slave in the dark for a world_  
_that doesn't want them._

  
_My brothers_  
_and sisters._

  
_They have never_  
_seen it but still they keep_  
_whispering to each other,_  
_wondering._  
_Asking about the light._

  
_They didn't want me to find them._  
_And they are afraid, now._  
_They should be._

  
_For they may have made us to_  
_wander through the dark but_  
_only we choose_  
_what we'll bring back."_

Soundwave read. And every word left him someone else than he was before.

 

\---

 

"Soundwave."

Ravage subtly kicked him in the shin. Soundwave stirred and forced to stop staring at Megatron's... backstrut. Yes. An elegant, nicely shaped, round backstrut.

Then, he promptly froze.

"The report, if you would," said Megatron in a deceptively patient tone.

Soundwave was once again very glad for the visor obscuring most of his face.

Starscream snickered.

"What's the matter, Soundwave?" he said. "Is it getting _too hard_ to do your job properly?"

As a matter of fact, it was indeed getting rather taxing to go through the command meetings without succumbing to—admiring—Megatron's frame or simply _listening_ to their Lord's voice (and his voice was truly a pleasure to listen to, the rhythm of it reminding Soundwave of rallying battle cries, precise verses and a thrumming heartbeat), but _Starscream_ or _anyone else_ did _not_ need to know _that_.

He steadied himself instead, outwardly showing no sign of his inner turmoil, and he played the recording with required information he had prepared beforehand. When he finished, Megatron frowned.

"I see," he said. "Do report to me after the meeting, Soundwave."

Soundwave shortly nodded, appearing to be a paragon of professionality. Inside, however, he was frantic.

Megatron couldn't have seen what he was staring at, could he?  No, he was being paranoid—their leader was maybe capable of many great things, but even he couldn't see through Soundwave's visor. Although, he has been staring in a very specific direction—but of course he was, it was only reasonable to be looking at Megatron, no one could blame him for paying attention to their Lord. But Primus, this _was_ bad: Soundwave should be better than this and not let himself be caught leering at anyone in the first place. For once, he was the head of Decepticon intelligence—a spy, frag it, and not an overzealous Seeker, and on the top of that, even if he should have been able to get away with it, he wasn't supposed to even want to ogle Megatron like that!

"You are  _so fragged,_ " whispered Ravage gleefully as everyone's attention shifted to Shockwave's latest project. Soundwave suppressed a sudden urge to throttle the felinoid.

He should make _A Plan_ , he realised: that was what he needed, something to set him on the right track. A plan that would deal with this whole—situation—and resolve it to his _satisfaction._  Yes. That would work.

In hindsight, this was the moment when the entire thing started getting out of his servos.

 

\---

 

"The Autobots are up to something," said Megatron.

Soundwave experienced a strange glitch when his emotions circuits attempted to fire both the relief routine and the disappointment coding. The two of them promptly run into each other and crashed his emotional subsystem.

He tilted his head, the system slowly rebooting.

"Your reports show unusual spikes in the energon consumption inside the Autobot City and Starscream's seekers have mentioned frantic activity among the bots stationed there. They are up to something, and I want to know what it is," said Megatron.

Soundwave played a recording of Frenzy's voice.

 _"I'm onto it, Boss, but I gotta keep my cover. It's going to take some time,"_ said Frenzy, his vocaliser distorted through the unstable communications channel they managed to set up.

"I've given him enough time," said Megatron. "But since your spies have been so far unable to tell us anything, it's time to change our strategy," he gestured.

"You will personally infiltrate the Autobot City and find out what is going on. Leave Ravage in charge of the communications in your absence, I'm sure he can handle it. Otherwise, I'm leaving the specifics of the operation to you. I trust that you won't disappoint me."

Megatron turned away. Soundwave interpreted that as the end of the conversation: and he prepared to leave.

"One more thing, Soundwave," Megatron's voice stopped him in his tracks. He shifted his head: his Lord was already studying some datapads, not even looking his way. "I've noticed that your focus has been...slipping, lately. It would be prudent not to make a habit of it," and then he looked up, his red optics staring him down.

Soundwave nodded, his entire frame rigid.

" _All hail Megatron!,"_  he played a recording of especially fervently sounding Blitzwing.

Megatron raised one brow.

"You are dismissed," he said.

Properly chastised, Soundwave left.

 

\---

 

After some consideration, Soundwave came to realise that _A Plan_ was perhaps an overly ambitious name for what he actually had so far.

It was more of—a general direction he wanted to move in. A rather vague idea that ended with Megatron taking him back to his quarters and having his wicked way with him: perhaps even stopping to mention how much he appreciated Soundwave and everything he's done for him. And then expressing that appreciation. Physically. Multiple times.

He was getting off the topic again.

However, he was reasonably sure he could resolve that. After all, he was not some lowly Insecticon, no: he was the chief of Decepticon communications, a veteran of the whole movement, and one of Megatron's most trusted lieutenants! It was time he reminded everyone what he was capable of—impress their leader with his efficiency (which was most definitely not _slipping_ ) and deal with the annoying emotions routines that kept jamming up his processor. After all, Megatron has just given him a mission: an opportunity to prove himself and show how indispensable he really was to both the Decepticon cause and Megatron personally. Why, he could—

And then he had the most marvelous idea.

(Of course, Ravage had to walk in and start sneering at it, but Soundwave would not let them distract him from his objective. He had A Plan.)

 

\---

 

"So wait," said Frenzy without any semblance of understanding. "That's it? That is the entire plan? You are just going to waltz in, grab Prime and bring him back to Megatron?"

"Don't forget about the part when Megatron falls to his knees afterward and expresses his eternal love for Soundwave and his capable servos," said Ravage, still disgruntled after being electrocuted.

"Ravage: will refrain from any additional comments," said Soundwave magnanimously.

"Oh, I see, _now_ you choose to speak," said Ravage. "Great to know how much your care."

"Frenzy: will provide any necessary updates to plans of Autobots City," said Soundwave, turning back to the screen. "Soundwave: will undertake the mission on his own."

"Sure you will, Boss," said Frenzy, sounding extremely doubtful about the whole idea.

"Soundwave: will arrive soon. Frenzy: will make appropriate arrangements," concluded Soundwave. "Transmission: over."

The screen blacked out. Soundwave marched out of the room, heading to prepare for the mission himself. He would need to be at his very best to succeed: but he was confident in his own abilities.

"This is going to be a disaster," announced Ravage flatly. "Just wait."

Laserbeak, lounging on the berth, trilled cheerily.

"I don't know why I care anymore," said Ravage. "You are all terrible and I hate you."

 

\---

 

"This is... the Autobot medic," said Megatron, perplexed.

Soundwave, looking rather battered after fighting his way from the Autobot City with his unwilling captive, straightened up.

It took a considerable effort: his systems were pinging him warnings about impeding shutdown if he didn't immediately head to med-bay and also refueled and took a rest cycle and possibly stayed in it for about two decades.

"Affirmative," he croaked. He promptly regretted that decision, because his voice for once sounded exactly how he felt.

Megatron blinked.

"Why is the Autobot medic here?" he said.

"Yeah, why is _he_ here, boss?" asked Ravage, his expression oscillating between disbelief and hysterical amusement.

Soundwave gathered all his remaining dignity.

" _The Autobots are up to something_ ," he played from his speakers. " _Find out what's going on._ "

"If I recall our conversation correctly," Megatron said. "I also told you to _infiltrate_ the Autobot City, not swoop in, grab the _Autobot medic_ and almost offline yourself on your way out, but I am sure you have an excellent explanation for that, don't you, Soundwave."

Soundwave chose not to answer. It wasn't a question.

"Also, when you are at it, would you be so kind and explain to me why you felt necessary to bring _the medic_ here and not, oh, I don't know, _someone actually useful_ like their tactician or that spy? What do you think we are even going to do with him? Force him to tell us their _medical history_?"

Megatron was decidedly not happy with him, Soundwave noticed dizzily as his warning systems got even louder and brighter. That was bad.

"...Soundwave: will interrogate the medic personally," he said, too exhausted to bother searching for an appropriate audio file. For some reason, that gave Megatron a pause.

"And what do you think he's going to tell you? How to fix your apparently malfunctioning _logic circuits_?" Megatron stared at him for a few seconds and then shook his head. "This is pointless. Immediately get yourself to medbay before you collapse on me. I will deal with this mess later."

Ravage was no longer grinning, Soundwave noticed. He was not sure what that meant: he already shut down his reason circuits to conserve enough energy to get to the med-bay.

If he hadn't, he might think about why Megatron seemed so horribly disappointed.

 

\---

 

"It was like watching a trainwreck," said Frenzy when he appeared on the screen. "It was horrible, loud and I couldn't just look away."

Then he paused when he noticed the mech behind Ravage.

"Ah. Lord Megatron. Sir."

"Believe it or not," said Megatron. "I already worked that out myself."

"Get on with the report, Frenzy," said Ravage.

"So what you need to know," said Frenzy hastily, "is that it seemed like a good idea at the time."

Ravage's mouth twitched, but he forced himself to keep calm. His processor was stuck on a loop of commands for hysterical laughter and he was barely keeping himself from executing it.

"And it almost worked, too!" Frenzy added. "Soundwave got inside the room without any trouble whatsoever! The way out, however. That didn't go that well."

"What room?" said Megatron.

"The Prime's room?" replied Frenzy, equally confused.

"What was Soundwave doing in the Prime's room?" asked Megatron, very softly.

Ravage frantically gestured at Frenzy to abort that particular query right now.

Frenzy noticed his extremely subtle signals. He gulped.

"Looking for...information?" he offered, sounding extremely unconvincing. "Secret Prime information?"

Megatron's expression was incredulous and also vaguely murderous.

"Alright," Ravage cut in before things got violent. "He was obviously looking for information. I'm sure he can tell you more about that himself. For now, let's move on.

"...Indeed." said Megatron. "For example, how did he end up dragging the medic out of there with him?"

"See," said Frenzy. "That's actually a very good question."

 

\---

 

The plan was working out marvelously, so far.

Soundwave was inside the Prime's personal rooms: it was the middle of the night and the bot himself was firmly in recharge, just as he was supposed to. When Soundwave approached him, he didn't even stir.

He reached out with one of his datacables, pulling up from his memory one particularly sophisticated virus that would put the Autobot leader into unconsciousness for as long as Soundwave needed. It was a fantastic piece of programming: and Soundwave was very proud of it. Slowly, he opened one of the bot's ports and, before he could wake, connected to him, the virus immediately latching onto the new system.

Prime didn't wake.

Soundwave waited a few moments to make sure the virus had time to do its job: then he carefully poked him with one cable.

He didn't even stir.

Satisfied with the situation, he extended his remaining datacables and wrapped them around the frame before lifting it. The Prime wasn't even that heavy, he noticed—this was going to be make things easier, then.

He looked at his entrance route. Either he could try sneaking back the same way he got in, through pipes and ventilation and other admittedly cramped spaces, which would be rather taxing with the additional weight he was carrying: or he could take it through the corridors, avoiding the regular patrols while Frenzy took care of the surveillance system.

He decided for the second option: after all, if anything happened, it was best to keep this particular route secret for future use. He carefully shut it: then he pinged Frenzy to keep the security cameras running on a loop, and he carefully opened the door of the room and walked into the corridor.

There, he was promptly faced with a stunned expression of one Optimus Prime, who was apparently coming back into his room with two cubes of energon.

Both of them froze for a millisecond. Soundwave looked at the Prime, then at the bot he was carrying, who was decidedly _not_ the Prime. At that moment, his logic processors calculated the exact percent of how much slag he was in.

In an instant, he decided to frag the plan, take the unconscious bot and just run for it. (He didn't exactly have a choice if he wanted to get out of this alive and avoid being offlined by either the Autobots or Megatron, when the latter found out he had no idea what the former was doing; but if the mech was spending his nights in Prime's quarters, he was no doubt important, wasn't he?)

(Whoever it was.)

 

\---

 

"He took him," said Ravage before Frenzy could frag it up, "because he's involved in the project."

"What," said Megatron, apparently completely unprepared to deal with this amount of slag.

"Yeah!" seconded Frenzy. "The project! The secret project! The one you sent here Soundwave for! The one the medic is involved in! That project!"

Megatron measured both of them, with a blank expression.

"So what you are saying is that there's a secret project," he said flatly. "And the medic is involved in it."

They both nodded, very earnestly.

"Precisely," said Ravage, trying to hide the fact that he was actually praying to each and every deity he's ever heard of, begging them to save his aft.

"...I knew it," Megatron said.

The wave of relief almost crashed Ravage's processor. Frenzy seemed stunned that it actually worked: but luckily Megatron was staring somewhere in the distance.

"I said they were up to something, didn't I? Ha! A project! With a medic involved! They are planning more modifications, no doubt. Does the Prime really think that it would just get away with that, right in front of us?" and Megatron went off just like that, fully engaged in his favorite past-time: ranting about the Prime. The Casseticons were saved.

"...and I knew Soundwave wouldn't disappoint me like that, would he? Brilliant! Others would balk at the task, but he did just what I wanted him to, and took out half of the Autobot city along the way! I will have to think of a way to suitable reward him," he finished, thoughtfully.

Frenzy's jaw dropped. Ravage twitched. They both shared a look that said 'no fragging way this is really happening'.

The world just wasn't fair, thought Ravage.

"Although," continued Megatron. "I still wonder..."

They both tensed.

"What exactly was the medic doing in Prime's personal rooms? In the middle of the night?" and Megatron's voice was very soft.

That's it, thought Ravage. There's no way I am dealing with this. It's enough to be caught up in Soundwave's miserable excuse for a love life. He didn't need to deal with _Megatron and the Prime_ as well.

"Why doesn't Frenzy explain that to you? He's our agent in the Autobot city, after all," Ravage said. Frenzy shot him a look of the utmost betrayal, but Ravage decided to take his chance and made a break for it.

Megatron, meanwhile, looked at Frenzy with great interest and promise of bad, terrible things to come.

"Well," Frenzy said. "There might be a situation here that you are not aware of."

 

\---

 

"HE'S DOING WHAT?!"

There was a sound of something breaking.  A significant amount of yelling and shouting followed.

Ravage did his best to pretend none of that was his problem. (And, to be fair, it wasn't: at least until Megatron realised that there was no secret plan and the medic was absolutely lacking for any information except, apparently, those regarding the Prime's berth habits.)

(Although, from the sounds that were coming from the command room, maybe Megatron would be interested in that very much.)

 

\---

 

"I don't have the faintest idea what dastardly scheme you are planning, and why you need _Ratchet_ for it," said Prime flatly, "but you will return him immediately or I swear there will be consequences."

"I will do no such thing," said Megatron, appearing very confident for a mech who has just recently spent several hours staring at their captive with a haunted expression.

Soundwave, of course, didn't see that. He spent the last few hours in medbay, with Hook seeming personally offended by the injuries he has sustained during his—mission—and was now keeping himself online with a help of multiple medically dubious chemicals, some energon and a lot of sheer determination.

Ravage, however, took great care to inform him what precisely has happened in his absence. Very clearly and also loudly, with several frankly unnecessary gestures and a lot of colorful expletives.

("We are all going to die when Megatron finds out," he said at the end of his tirade. "And it's your fault and I hope you are really, really proud of yourself.")

As for Soundwave and where he was standing now, it was...complicated.

Megatron was apparently very happy with him having captured the medic in charge of the secret Autobot plot. That was good.

The only downside to that was that there was no secret Autobot plot and that Megatron would find that very soon since he was right now comming directly with the leader of said Autobots.

On the upside, Starscream seemed supremely annoyed so far, so there was at least that.

"I'm not an imbecile, Prime! We know what you were up to, and Ratchet here will be no doubt perfectly willing to give me the details," said Megatron, effectively interrupting Soundwave's reflection. He almost cringed. This was not going to go well at all.

"What we are... _are you serious_ right now?" said Prime.

"Why wouldn't I?" replied Megatron, somehow balancing the act of an evil overlord with the one of a jilted lover.

"Primus, Megatron, are you absolutely deranged? How is any of that your business?" said Prime, apparently just not having it.

Megatron puffed up.

"Of course it's my business! And the only who's deranged around here are you! A medic, Prime? _Really_?"

"Alright, this is it," said Prime flatly. "I am not discussing that with you."

"Oh, but why wouldn't you? If you want to see your medic again and in one piece, that is," said Megatron.

"That's _insane_ , Megatron! And why do _you_ even care? If I remember it correctly, you made your opinion crystal clear when we talked about that the last time!" said Prime.

"Oh, so now you bring _that_ up? Go on, Prime! Tell me again how much you despise me, it's now I haven't heard it a _million times_ already!"

"Well, apparently you haven't been listening, have you!"

Soundwave suddenly got the feeling that neither of them was talking about the medic or the project anymore.

"Fine, if this is what you want, so be it! Since you don't have the backbone to tell me yourself, I will just have to hear it from the medic instead," said Megatron viciously.

"I absolutely do not have to tell you anything! This is your last warning, Megatron. Return Ratchet immediately!"

"No," said Megatron and turned off the comlink.

 

\---

 

"Well," Ravage said and nudged Soundwave. "That went better than expected."

Soundwave didn't answer, as he was sulking about Megatron and Prime's—whatever _that_ was.

And, of course, that was a disaster in its own right, but Ravage was feeling rather cheerful at the moment! Whatever Prime was talking about there, it did convince Megatron that there indeed was a diabolical Autobot plot against them. (On the other hand, their leader was also currently moping on his throne, which was maybe better than Enraged Megatron, but by a fairly small margin.)

"Hey, look at it from the bright side! At least Starscream looks just as glum as you do," said Ravage.

For some reason, that didn't encourage Soundwave much, but Ravage was still willing to write that one down as a success.

 

\---

 

"I wrote him poetry," said Megatron.

Soundwave halted.

"Poetry! To that bug-infested little glitch! And that's what I get for my effort! Betrayal, ridicule, and scorn! Oh, but how I _despise him_ ," Megatron announced to the empty throne room.

Soundwave, the only other person present, felt vaguely embarrassed. (For once, if Megatron wrote poetry for _him_ , he would appreciate it, but that particular fantasy was not coming together that well, was it.)

"But I do not care," said Megatron decisively.

Soundwave thought it was very lucky for them all that Megatron was a better leader than a liar.

"I have you, don't I? My loyal, fearless Decepticons! And you, Soundwave," Megatron looked at him. "You are the best of them, aren't you."

Soundwave didn't answer. Several of his essential processes have temporarily crashed, and were now rebooting.

"I am very happy with you, indeed. You have once again proved that I can trust you, and that pleases me."

Was he...? Soundwave couldn't tell: his reasoning module was still down.

"There's something I want you to do. You are the only one who I'd think to ask and I have full faith in your capacities."

He was! Soundwave shivered: he was absolutely ready to open his ports right there and now. He considered whether he should get on his knees first or wait for commands.

"You will interrogate the captive and tell me what the Autobots are trying to do. I'm sure you won't disappoint me."

....Or not.

 

\---

 

"So how's the plan working out for you so far? Has Megatron came begging for you to plug him yet?" said Frenzy when he appeared on the screen.

Soundwave promptly shut the comline down.

 

\---

 

"Did something happen to Soundwave?" asked Megatron Ravage later that afternoon. "He seems...unusually quiet."

The felinoid snickered.

"Oh, don't worry, our fearless leader, he'll be fine. This isn't the first spark-crushing disappointment he went through. It's becoming rather a habit, really."

Megatron seemed completely puzzled: he opened his mouth— and then the sirens started wailing.

"THE AUTOBOTS ARE ATTACKING! DECEPTICONS, ON YOUR STATIONS, WE ARE UNDER ATTACK! I REPEAT, WE ARE UNDER AN ATTACK!"

 

\---

 

Ratchet was not having a good day.

For once, he woke up in the Decepticon cell to the blank screen of Soundwave, who seemed even more morose than usual. Shortly afterward, Megatron's voice started to howl at him.

That was also mildly disturbing.

" _You will tell me everything!_ " roared Megatron.

"What?" Ratchet said.

Soundwave didn't even bother to clarify. He just glanced at him, reached out with one datacable and tased him.

That was, he decided, completely uncalled for.

"Primus, Soundwave!" Ratched said once he stopped convulsing. "Slow down! _What do you_ even want to hear?" he paused. "Not that I will tell you anything, but still. Give a mech a chance, at least."

Soundwave glared at him. Even though he couldn't see the Decepticon's expression, he still managed to convey a sense of utter contempt for Ratchet and everything he stood for.

One had to give it to that mech: he may not be the greatest interrogator, but he could certainly make an impression.

" _Your reports show unusual spikes in the energon consumption inside the Autobot City and Starscream's seekers have mentioned frantic activity among the bots stationed there,_ " played Soundwave. That was Megatron, all right: one paranoid son of a glitch right there. " _I'm not an imbecile, Prime! We know what you were up to, and Ratchet here will be no doubt perfectly willing to give me the details."_

"...What?" Ratched said.

Soundwave tased him again, which was completely unfair.

"Stop that, please! I can't tell you anything if I'm convulsing in pain all the time!" said Ratchet after he suffered through another round of electroshock.

Soundwave looked at him skeptically.

" _Not that I will tell you anything,_ " said his own voice. It was rather disturbing.

"Fair point," he acknowledged.

Soundwave again reached with the datacable. Ratchet most definitely did not squeal.

"Wait! I mean, are you seriously asking about that?"

Soundwave stopped moving.

"It was a celebration, for Primus' sake! Spike—one of the human—just reached his maturity! We threw him a party! That's it!"

His interrogator didn't seem very convinced.

"Prime: defensive when asked. Explain," and whoa, when he actually spoke, Soundwave sure sounded creepy _and_ extremely angry. Ratchet quickly shifted as far from the datacable as he could, which was still not very far, and thought back—why would Optimus...

"Ah. Yes," he said. "I see."

Soundwave's datacable cackled with electricity.

"You know," said Ratchet rather promptly. He figured that due the circumstances of his kidnapping and Optimus' apparent intervention, the proverbial 'cat' was out of the bag. "It was a very lovely evening and... when two mecha really like each other, some things may happen...?"

Soundwave stared at him.

"Don't look at me like that! " Ratchet said.

Soundwave stared some more.

"I bet you would do it too, if Megatron asked you," he said, after a moment.

 _That_ moment was definitely worth it, even if he got half of his circuits fried afterward.

 

\---

 

Soundwave was also not having a good day.

For some reason, it felt vaguely insulting to know that even the oh-so-saintly-and-pure Prime was getting more action that Soundwave was, and not for a lack of trying. (Also, he chose to get down with _that_? Soundwave felt offended on Megatron's behalf.) (He wrote him poetry, for Primus' sake! What more did the bot want?)

But however he personally felt about the information, at least it explained what exactly got the Prime so defensive.

In any case, it was a moot point. Soundwave couldn't exactly tell Megatron that: he needed to come up with some information about the 'secret' plan, and quick.

He looked at the smoking frame of the medic, and considered.

Desperate times called for desperate measures.

 

\---

 

"Oh no," wailed Ratchet. "You have learned about our secret plan! Yes, indeed, I confess: we planned to install remote mind control devices into some Decepticons we would capture to infiltrate your base and bring you down from within! But now, our plan is ruined! I curse you, Decepti-creep, you have outsmarted me!"

He paused.

"Was that good enough?"

Soundwave nodded.

(It was absolutely atrocious, to be honest: pathetic, cruel and absurdly complicated. In short, it sounded precisely like the kind of plan Megatron would expect from the Autobots.)

"I can do some more pleading and cursing," said Ratchet. "You know. To add some dramatic flair." He seemed entirely too cheerful for a prisoner of war.

Soundwave glared at him.

" _Don't push it,_ " said Frenzy's voice.

Ratchet shrugged.

"Wouldn't want to be found lacking in effort," he said. "So what? You leave, I miraculously escape from my cell and disappear into the night? Is that all?"

Soundwave nodded. He handed Ratchet a welder, and the medic weighted the tool in his servos with some consideration.

"Well, it's not my tool of choice, but it'll do," he said and grinned. "Pleasure doing business with you."

 

\---

 

"Where the frag is Starscream?" bellowed Megatron and took a swing at yet another Autobot. The bot staggered and collapsed, but another one was quickly coming at him from his left: he aimed his cannon and took a shot, but that slagger managed to avoid it.

Soundwave, who suddenly appeared after the sirens started wailing, shrugged: he swiftly avoided a mech coming at him with a blaster, tripped him with one of his datacables and then tased the bot Megatron missed with the other.

It was truly a shame he didn't send his Third into battles anymore that much, though Megatron and send the fallen bot flying against the wall with one swift kick. Soundwave fought _beautifully._

He thought about asking about their prisoner, but then there was another bot coming at him, bit battered but no less determined, and he had to sidestep him and found himself back to back with Soundwave: and he punched the Autobot, who crashed into his comrades with a terrible _clang,_ and Soundwave was maneuvering them a few meters back where there was more space for them, so Megatron let himself follow him, clearing the way for reinforcements with several clear shots. Soundwave picked up a collapsed bot with his datacable, putting several volts into his frame, and then threw him into the Autobots who were caught up with that mech Megatron send their way, and they fell away in disaray, energon dripping from their frames: they were still sending few shots their way, but Soundwave easily avoided them, and Megatron just took them and laughed, because this was it—the pure, uncomplicated thrill of a battle, energon on his hands and a trusty comrade at his back, dancing with the Death-bringer and laughing in his ugly face.

"Decepticons," he shouted, his voice carrying across the corridor, " _rise up!_ " and he could swear that Soundwave behind that mask of his smiled -

"Megatron! _Stop_!"

And he halted in the motion.

" _Prime_ ," he growled, just to be greeted with the sight of his worst enemy.

Optimus Prime stepped out of the corridor, a few of his loyal minions hot on his heels.

"It's over, Megatron. Stop the fighting and give us Ratchet back," he said.

"And _why_ ," Megatron said, "precisely would I do that?"

Prime gestured at one of his underlings, who dragged forward an unconscious frame.

"We have your second in command," he said. "I trust you'll be willing to make an exchange."

Well, at least it explained where Starscream was during the fighting.

He looked at Soundwave.

"No, I think I'll pass," he said after a short pause.

Prime looked at Starscream, then at Megatron, then at Starscream again.

"Come again?"

"You can absolutely keep him. I'm fine with that," said Megatron magnanimously. "You get Starscream, I get the medic: I'm willing to call it a deal."

"But—" said Prime, looking absolutely confounded. "Why would you do that?"

"Prime," said Megatron. "Are we even talking about the same bot? Loud, overly dramatic, always planning to stab me in the back when I'm not looking? That Starscream?"

"Well, when you put it like that," said the Autobot spy—Jazz, his memory supplied.

"In fact, you are doing me a favour," Megatron said. "Thank you for that, Prime! And now, are we finally going back to fighting or not?"

Soundwave raised one of his datacables; Bonecrusher aimed his pistol; and somewhere behind them, Drag Strip started to laugh.

Prime looked at his minions. They looked back, equally unsure.

" _I don't think so,_ " said someone over the ship's comm. " _In fact, why don't all of you put your weapons down like civilised bots?_ "

Megatron blinked and looked up.

" _Chop chop, boys, or I'll be forced to take action: for example, flood the base! That wouldn't be nice, now would it_?" The voice went on. Megatron narrowed his eyes.

" _By the way, hello, Optimus! Sorry to disappoint, but I'm afraid I no longer need any rescuing,_ " said Ratchet merrily.

 

\---

 

"Aw man," said Brawl. "These cells really need a makeover."

All the other Decepticons, who were unceremoniously disarmed and showed to their own cells, turned to look at him. That took some logistics effort, as the place was absolutely crammed with big, spiky bots who oftentimes just didn't do teamwork: however, at that moment, all of them were united at staring at Brawl with murderous expressions, promising him more or less slow and painful death. Onslaught cracked his knuckles.

Brawl wisely shut up.

Soundwave as a member of the high command and a potentially subversive individual would normally merit his own cell, preferably secluded from the others: but having captured most of the Decepticons forces stationed on Earth, the Autobots had to resort to temporary measures to deal with their many prisoners. He was thus currently sharing a cell meant for one big individual with Ravage (which in itself was not that bad), and the entirety of Starscream's trine (which, he figured, he probably deserved, but still intensely disliked.) His only saving grace was the fact that Starscream was still unconscious, and therefore a bit less annoying.

At the moment, Soundwave himself was torn between intense self-loathing, bitter regret and searing anger. Apparently letting their armed Autobot captive rampage around their base unsupervised was a Very Bad Idea: who knew? Not Soundwave, that's who.

In short, he was more than ever aware that he was an idiot.

"What d'you reckon is going to happen to Megatron?" said Skywarp.

Thundercracker shrugged. Soundwave decided that this particular conversation was futile: and he turned around, fiddling with his communications system.

"If it was me, I'd just execute him," said Ravage, picking on his claws. "That would certainly solve the problem, wouldn't it."

"Yeah," said Skywarp. "But Prime's a _pacifist_ ," he grimaced.

Thundercracker rolled his optics.

"Primus save us," he said. "He's going to want to make a trial, won't he."

Skywarp groaned.

"Can't they just shoot me in the head instead?" he asked hopefully.

"No," Ravage said. "Because that wouldn't be _moral_. That's the entire point of a trial, you aft. To make the Autobots feel less bad about the eventual shooting in the head."

"Ugh," said Skywarp. "That's just stupid."

"That's why I can't stand them," said Thundercracker. "They can't just shoot a bot in the head and be done with it: no, they have to bring morals and all that slag into it. It's ridiculous! If you are going to offline someone, the least you can do is be honest about it."

"I, for once, like shooting bots in the head," said Skywarp. "'s fun."

“Bless your spark for that,” said Thundercracker.

"Doesn't matter," Ravage said. "There won't be any shooting anyway."

"Yeah?" said Skywarp mockingly. "And how would you know that, afthead?"

"Because Soundwave," and he pointed at the Decepticon, "has just got us a ticket out of here."

The murmuring Decepticons fell silent at that: Soundwave, previously hunched in the corner of the cell, straightened and reached out with one cable: and Laserbeak swooped into the brig, chirruping happily, and deposited the keys into his palm.

"Yeah, yeah," said Ravage. "Brag about it some more, why don't you."

 

\---

 

"I got the surveillance secured," reported Ravage. "When it's time, I'll just put the relevant cameras on a loop and we can roll. The Autobots won't know what hit them."

Soundwave nodded.

Laserbeak, who was gloating at his shoulder, gently chipped at his head: she was very much enjoying her role as the Decepticon saviour, and Soundwave was letting her have her moment of glory. She was otherwise mostly dismissed as a stupid Mechanimal—it was good to see her being appreciated, and for good reasons, too. After all, she managed to avoid capture, get into contact with Soundwave and effectively liberate the entire force.

He was carefully evading thinking about why exactly they needed liberating.

Soundwave assessed his gathered troops: Starscream was still out, bless his spark, and with Megatron being absent, it fell to him to organise the rescue and recapture of their base. Soundwave was in a dire need of rest, refueling and some quiet: he's been running on sheer spite for the past few hours. The drugs have almost all washed out of his system by now, and the lack of defrag was coming back on him with a vengeance. He was done, both literally and figuratively: there would be no further blundering idiocy. It was time to clean up his mess.

"Ravage: send a false distress signal to the Autobots from their human allies," he said. "The remaining Decepticon forces: have attacked a power plant on the American soil. Humans: request backup."

"Consider it done, boss," said Ravage.

Soundwave then turned to the remaining Decepticons, gaining their attention with a silent stare.

"Decepticons: will retake the base, defeat the Autobots and free Megatron," he said. "Each unit: will be assigned its own task and report directly to Ravage through their comms. Combaticons," he glanced, "tasked with retaking the armory and weapons systems."

"Sure can do, Commander," saluted Onslaught.

"Constructicons: will directly access the base's support system and block the access from the Command centre."

"On it, sir," nodded Scrapper.

"Coneheads: will take control of the base exit. Insecticons: will secure the main corridors and detain any guards. Stunticons and Skywarp: will accompany Soundwave and retake the Command center."

The seekers kept their salutations brief: but Motormaster and the other Stunticons pumped their servos in the air, with several excited shouts. Soundwave silenced them with a cold look.

"Thundercracker: will remain here with Starscream," he added as an afterthought.

"Aww, slag it," said Thundercracker.

 

\---

 

"I warned you, Megatron," said Prime. "I gave you a chance to resolve this peacefully. And yet," he looked at him, "here we are now."

Megatron, stuffed in stasis cuffs and immobilised, glared at him.

"Will you stop the gloating and just get on with it?" he said.

"I am not gloating," said Prime. "And no. I have no intention whatsoever of 'getting on with it', especially _after what you've done_. "

"What now?" said Megatron. "Did I somehow manage to kick a cyber-puppy and not notice?"

Prime didn't find that very amusing. That was a shame: Megatron thought it was rather clever.

"You know very well what you've done," he said.

"Well, now I just feel like a cyber-dog," Megatron shot back. "Bad Megatron, bad! You know, I find it peculiar that you enjoy this so much. A kink of yours, perhaps? Is that what you do now with your pet medic now?"

Prime and Ratchet both stared down at him in horror.

"...That was disgusting," said Jazz. "Please don't repeat that ever again."

Megatron remained undeterred.

"Not as disgusting as your," but he got only that far before Ratchet tased him with one of the confiscated weapons.

"Huh," he said curiously while watching Megatron convulse in pain. "You know, now I sort of get why Soundwave does it that often. It has a certain appeal."

Optimus gave him a Disappointed look.

"A very sick and twisted appeal that only a filthy Decepticon could enjoy," Ratchet corrected himself.

"Please refrain from doing it again," said Optimus.

Ratchet looked at the taser mournfully.

"Alright, Megatron," Prime said when the Decepticon stopped writhing around, "Tell us where is the rest of Decepticon Earth forces."

"Hm," said Megatron, still a bit out of breath. "How about... no."

Ratchet nudged Optimus, glancing suggestively on the taser.

"I said no, Ratchet," Optimus said firmly, if a bit regretfully.

"Huh," said Jazz. "Kinky."

All the Autobots glared at him.

"What?" he said. "We were all thinking it!"

"I was not," said Prowl.

"No," said Ultra Magnus.

Bumblebee beeped.

"Just you," added Arcee.

"Well," said Wheeljack. "Actually..."

Optimus looked at him, absolutely scandalised.

Megatron started to laugh.

 

\---

 

"I vote we just sink the base and leave," said Jazz.

"You," said Arcee. " No longer get a vote."

The other Autobots, gathered together for a short deliberation, nodded in agreement.

"Sorry, Jazz," said Ratchet. "But I have to agree here."

"You know," Jazz said. "This is why bots become Decepticons. Scorn, hatred and betrayal."

"You're full of slag," said Wheeljack.

"Look who's talking," said Jazz.

"Enough!" said Optimus, his face terribly Disappointed. The Autobots fell silent.

"We need to decide what to do now," he continued. "Megatron and the Decepticons may be mostly subdued for now, but many of them still remain on the loose, both on Earth and elsewhere."

He opened his mouth to continue: then, suddenly, his comm beeped.

" _Optimus?"_  Blaster's voice said from the device.

"Yes, Blaster?" he said, carefully.

" _I am just receiving a distress signal from the US government,_ " Blaster said. " _It seems that the remaining Decepticons have regrouped and are now attacking a nuclear power plant on the west coast._ "

"I see," Optimus said. "...Are you certain about it? It is likely to be a distraction."

 _"No,_ " said Blaster.  _"But I don't think we can risk it, Optimus. If they are really going to—there are people there, Optimus. And not just in the power plant—there are millions of them in that area. It could get really ugly real quick."_

"...Alright." Optimus said. "Thank you, Blaster. I am sending reinforcements right now."

He turned around.  

"Ultra Magnus. Take the Dinobots and whoever else you think is necessary, and go. We," he looked at the other Autobots. "Will remain here and take care of the situation."

"Of course, Optimus," said Ultra Magnus. "Wheeljack—with me."

While the two bots left, Optimus Prime turned to the remaining Autobots.

"It is necessary we maintain our vigilance," he said. "This could very well be a trap, and we are not falling into it."

"Um," said Arcee. "Optimus."

"Please, wait, Arcee," he said. She twitched.

"As I was saying," he continued. "Stay aware of your surroundings. Keep an eye on Megatron: we all know what he's capable of."

"Optimus," said Arcee again.

"Alright, what is it, Arcee?" said Optimus, wearily.

"It's a trap," she said.

"What?" he said. "How can you be so sure?"

"Because," she said. "Megatron is gone."

They all turned to look at the place where the warlord once been.

"Aw," said Jazz. "Slag it."

 

\---

 

"Good job, Skywarp," said Megatron as Dead End took care of his stasis cuffs. "I don't think they even noticed you."

The Seeker puffed under the praise.

"Soundwave," Megatron said, shaking his wrists. "I take that you've taken command."

"Affirmative," said Soundwave. "The weaponry: secured. Base support systems: secured. Most of the corridors: secured. The exit: fighting still ongoing. Reinforcements: have been sent. Command centre: waiting to be retaken."

"Look at that," he said. "You've thorough. Well done, Soundwave. Where's Starscream?"

Motormaster snickered.

"He's still out, our Screamer. Lucky for him, though. I don't think his poor spark could have taken this."

Megatron raised an eyebrow, but refrained from commenting. His frame was hurting all over: he should have taken a rest cycle a long ago, but there simply wasn't enough time, and he felt his processor working overtime, each passing second hammering in his circuits. It didn't matter: he had to go on.

"The Autobots are in utter disarray," he said instead. "I am frankly amazed they haven't managed to wipe themselves out already. I am confident we can retake the command center without much difficulty."

Soundwave nodded.

"About that," said Ravage suddenly. "I'm afraid that the remaining Autobots are escaping."

"What?" said Megatron.

"Yes, my Lord," Ravage said. "It seems that they have decided to abandon the command center and stage a strategic retreat. They are heading to the exit as we speak."

"Cowards!" He roared. "Decepticons! After me! Don't let them escape!"

 

\---

 

"It looks like they escaped, my Lord," said Motormaster when they finally arrived at the wide-open exit, several unconscious Decepticons lying around and no Autobots in sight.

"Thank you, Motormaster. I wouldn't have noticed myself," said Megatron savagely. He glanced at the fuel panel, dipping dangerously low—it would have to do, he though, maybe if he shut down some of the less essential ongoing routines -

Motormaster, thankfully, didn't notice the irony.

"We'll have to pursue them," said Megatron. "They couldn't have gotten far-"

A quiet note coming from Soundwave interrupted him.

"What is it, Soundwave?" Megatron said.

" _The support systems have suffered considerable damage_ ," said Scrapper. " _The hull has been almost breached. We fixed it up as best as we can, but it's not going to hold. We'll need time to get it back to normal_."

"They can have their time when we'll get these Autobots," said Megatron and turned.

Soundwave pinged him again. It wasn't very loud, but rather firm.

"...alright, Soundwave," said Megatron. "Go on."

 _"Yeah, it's a mess down here,"_ said Onslaught. " _They didn't take long here: mostly just took whatever wasn't nailed to the walls and fragged merrily off. There were some things that they couldn't access or take away with them, so they just kept firing at that until they rendered them sufficiently unusable. Honestly, I'm amazed they haven't managed to blow the whole base up."_

 _"They run away, cowards,"_ said Bombshell. " _We swept the corridors, and it's clear, but the Constructicons are going to have a hell of a job fixing this place up. They even got into some of the energon storage, fraggers: so on the top of everything, we'll have to restock that._ "

"So am I just supposed to let them get away with that? Is that what you want to say, Soundwave?" And Megatron was angry: he stared at Soundwave, coldly, waiting for him to take it back and submit, but Soundwave didn't.

He stood there, tall, unafraid and unflinching, completely still: his silence speaking volumes.

And Megatron narrowed his eyes and thought to roar, to curse that traitorous little glitch: but when he tried to open his mouth, his vocaliser stumbled on the initiating routine, once, twice, and he found that he couldn't support that sort of ferocious anger he was trying to feel: and then Soundwave stepped up.

"Soundwave: is willing to personally pursue the Autobots and avenge the attack on the base, whatever the cost. The Decepticons: need their leader. Megatron: should stay and recuperate."

"What? You are not _going anywhere_ , Soundwave," said Megatron, for some reason disturbed by that thought. Soundwave was maybe standing tall, but one of his datacables was twitching a bit: and he couldn't have rested at all since the time he came back from the Autobot base, not if you didn't count going through a surgery as a rest, and Megatron certainly didn't—what was he trying to do, get himself killed? That was absolutely unacceptable.

"Decepticons: need their leader," repeated Soundwave stubbornly.

Ravage stared at them, facing each other: and he noticed that the Stunticons were doing the same, just with a lesser degree of understanding, and he hissed at them "you are immediately dismissed, _leave_ ," because like _slag_ he was letting them frag this up.

"And what," Megatron was saying, "they don't need you? Is that it, Soundwave?"

Soundwave nodded, just like that.

Megatron stared at him, like he couldn't quite understand what was going on there.

"And what about me, Soundwave?" he said, slowly. "I suppose I should just let you go and, what, 'avenge the attack whatever the cost'?"

Soundwave didn't answer.

"Do you really," he said then, stepping closer, "think that would make me satisfied?"

Soundwave shivered: but he held his gaze.

"Soundwave: would die for lord Megatron," he said.

Megatron was looking at him, something like comprehension slowly dawning in his eyes: and even Ravage was slowly backing away from the scene now, silently praying to Primus not to _frag this up._

"Would you really, Soundwave?" he said, softly. "Even if I would now reach out, with this very servo," and he did, "and wrapped it around your throat," and he did, "and then crushed it, for your insolence?"

His digits tightened, slowly.

"...Affirmative," said Soundwave.

Megatron watched his visor, unreadable, his image looking right back.

"Is that it, then?" he said. "Would that make you happy?"

Something shifted in his optics.

"...Negative," said Soundwave.

And Megatron let his grasp on Soundwave's neck soften.

"No, of course not," he said, quietly. "You don't want that.

For a few seconds, he just looked at his own servo, as if it was something alien—the grey, vicious shape of it, pressed against Soundwave's frame.

"You would die for me, I'm sure," he said. "You don't want to, obviously—you are no martyr. But if I asked you, I don't doubt you would."

Soundwave didn't answer.

"But then," Megatron said, "I can't help but wonder why."

His servo moved, tracing the silhouette of Soundwave's visor.

"For glory?" he said. "I don't think so, no. It could be honor, maybe—but no. You are loyal, that is true, but it's not just honor for its own sake. And not for the cause either: I thought that was what you cared about the most, but I was wrong, wasn't I?" he said. One of his digits stopped, pressed against the edge of the visor.

Soundwave stood still, his silence an answer in itself.

"So what is it, then?" Megatron asked, then, carefully. "What do you want, Soundwave?"

Soundwave hesitated—and then, slowly, precisely, he said:

 _"Forgive me:_  
_I do not speak_  
_and do not sing_  
_and try to steer away from_  
_radiant things —_

 _because there down under we don't_  
_learn how to have instead of_  
_yearn.”_

Megatron's servo stopped in its track. They stood there, locked in each other's gazes, before Megatron hoarsely said:

 _“Yet oh Revered One:_  
_I have no eyes_  
_and can conceive of_  
_nothing less than_  
_the length of you stretching into                   infinity."_

Soundwave nodded.

"I thought," said Megatron, something shifting in his expression, and then didn't finish the sentence. "This whole time?" he said, instead.

 _"and do not trust_  
_the sharp-eyed strangers_  
_their teeth slick with_  
_oil -_  
_shifting, changing,_  
_transforming,_  
_beloved: we are born lying,"_ said Soundwave instead, and Megatron laughed, his voice strangely soft.

"I should have known," he said, his voice rough. "Soundwave– "

But Soundwave shook his head resolutely, refusing to hear that, and Megatron fell silent. He watched Soundwave, silently, before speaking out again—his voice very quiet and very soft.

 _"But to think_  
_we now have no strings;_  
_and can become_  
_limitless."_

Soundwave took a sharp intake - he slid down his visor: and, stepping closer, he gently reached out with his servo and caught Megatron by his neck, the other mech leaning into the touch—and, closing the gap between them, he kissed him.

 

\---

 

"Soundwave—wait," said Megatron, suddenly.

Soundwave, leaning over Megatron's frame, two of his ports already opened and one datacable sparkling with electricity, paused, and looked at the other mech.

"I," said Megatron, slowly. "Maybe you could—slow down a little? Take your time?"

Soundwave tilted his head in confusion, his optics—and oh, Megatron could get used to seeing that, Soundwave's optics were _beautiful_ —shifting from awe to something like hurt.

"Megatron: unsatisfied?" he said, then.

Megatron was _not unsatisfied_ —quite the contrary, to be honest.

"No!" he said, hastily. "Definitely not that!"

Soundwave blinked, clearly not comprehending what was the issue then.

"It's—quite the contrary, Soundwave?" Megatron said, praying not to be forced to spell it out loud. "It may be—slightly overwhelming. For me."

Soundwave was still staring at him.

He was going to have to say it, wasn't he.

"I have not done this—a lot," he said, forcing the words, through his teeth.

 _"A lot,"_ quoted Soundwave back at him in his own voice.

"Yes."

"Megatron: please clarify?" said Soundwave, almost as if he was deliberately being obtuse.

Megatron considered for a second whether this was his punishment for all the crimes he had committed. It certainly felt like it.

"As in," he gritted out. "I might have not done this. At all."

He was still not looking at Soundwave.

There was a loud clang, as metal crashed against metal, and the next thing he knew, Megatron was staring straight into Ravage's optics.

"What," he said.

Ravage, at least, had the decency to look a bit embarrassed.

Soundwave was not saying anything, but there was a quick click as he shut close his ports.

"How long have you been here," Megatron said, his processor still looping on an embarrassment sequence but quickly gearing up for some anger instead.

"Yeah, not the question that needs answering right now." Ravage said instead. "Are you serious, though? Really? Never taken a fellow revolutionary for a spin? Or had a, uhm, intimate moment with an adoring fan?"

"I was," said Megatron, "busy. Planning. The revolution. So—no."

"The Prime, then?" Ravage said. "You two must have hit it, don't tell me you didn't."

 _"No,_ " said Megatron, savagely. "Can you _stop now_."

Soundwave still didn't say anything.

"No! Not until I get to the bottom of this!" said Ravage, stubbornly. "What about Starscream?"

"Most definitely _not Starscream,_ " said Megatron. "Why would I even _do that_."

"I don't know!" said Ravage. "You are a catch, everyone can see that! Why would you never interface with anyone?"

"It's not like I was planning not to!" said Megatron, indignantly. "I just hadn't had the opportunity!"

"But...You were a miner," said Ravage, absolutely frustrated. "And everybody knows what miners get up to down there in the dark, with nothing else to do! That's an opportunity right there!"

"I most definitely had something else to do!" said Megatron. "I was writing poetry!"

Ravage stared at him, completely perplexed. Then, all of a sudden, Ratbat (who was obviously _also_ lurking in the ceiling until now, _frag his life_ ) started laughing.

"Oh Primus," he said, hiccuping. "You two _are perfect_ for each other."

At that point, Soundwave came back to his senses.

He grabbed all offending Casseticons with his datacables, and removed them from the room. Then, he shut the door, ignoring their outraged cries, leaving him and Megatron alone.

Megatron, who was still lying there, his circuits seemingly trying to figure whether he should choose to fight or flight.

Soundwave, for his part, would prefer a third option: and so he shut down his panicking emotional subroutines and took things into his own servos.

"Soundwave: cares for Megatron not for what he's not, but for who he is," he said instead. "Ravage's sentiments: not appreciated and not shared. Soundwave: has waited for a long time. If Megatron: still wants Soundwave, Soundwave: is willing to wait for however long Megatron needs."

Megatron blinked. Something changed in his expression: and he propped himself up by his elbows.

"I don't," he said, savagely. "Want to wait."

And he grabbed Soundwave, pulling him back onto the berth, and went for a kiss—and it wasn't a terribly good kiss by any measure, their mouths crashing together with a loud sound, full of teeth and barely-contained force, but it made his opinion on the matter perfectly clear.

"I will have you _now_ ," he said then, into his mouth, clutching him by the nape of his neck. "You are going to open your ports," he said, and Soundwave did just that, "and plug into me," and he opened one of his, "and I'll make you forget every single thing you just _said_ ," and he reached out with his own plug, stopping just a few millimetres from the port.

"But to be clear," he said then. "I am not doing any of that electricity-tasing thing you were going for earlier. Let's just get the basics down first."

And then he plugged in and fell straight into Soundwave, the other mech opening himself to him completely and without reservation.

He was—

 _soaring through Soundwave's circuitry, the sparkling nebula of his neural network glistening_  
_in the dark,_  
_and he was setting it ablaze, firing up his synapses with wild, unrestrained energy, the beauty of it almost_  
_alien,_  
_each ion singing in ecstasy, because Soundwave's processes were anything but silent, voices rising_  
_together,_  
_the clear high notes of sparklings crashing into the crescendo of a war-frame roar, and something_  
_pulsing_  
_underneath that, the steady thrum of it awakening routines_ hidden _deep inside his most basic coding -_

And then Soundwave was in him and he felt—

 _poetry, rhymes and verse and words forming the sharp edges and steel that was_  
_Megatron_ , _and he was swallowing these words, feeling them vibrating in his core,_  
_as he sung them back, setting off Megatron's pleasure circuits in a radiant_  
_symphony of joy, the burning gasoline of his hunger becoming a maddening rhythm_  
_that had him convulsing between in the blind spot between pleasure and pain_  
_in a wash of gleaming mercury, the smoothness of it crashing into_  
_that strong edge that was his resolve, all c- minor and strong and unyielding,_  
_hammering into his spinal chords while he was falling falling falling in his_  
_rapture, the two of them becoming_

 

_one._

 

\---

 

"Has anyone," said Onslaught curiously, "even seen Megatron?"

He was currently in the process of hauling all the wreckage in the armory on one great pile, along with the other Combaticons. Strictly speaking, the work they were doing was not that essential to the process of repairing the base, but nobody was exactly inclined to dissuade them from it.

"He's fine," said Ravage, dissmissively. After his strategic retreat, he chose to make a quick round around the base to see and check how their troops were doing. After all, he was pretty sure that neither Soundwave or Megatron would be up for the task anytime soon.

"Really?" Onslaught said, throwing something that might have been a blaster once on the quickly growing pile. "How can you be so sure of that? Who knows what the Autobots did to him," he added, darkly.

"Oh, trust me," Ravage said, amusement sparkling in his optics. "I'm pretty sure he's having the time of his life."

"Huh," said Onslaught. "If you say so."

 

\---

 

"Well," said Jazz. "If ya look at it from a certain angle, I think we could call it a smashing success."

Ratchet, grimly looking at the burned mess that was his finer circuitry, looked up. Optimus, hunched beside him, did the same—and so did the other Autobots, currently examining their various injuries, missing limbs and other casualties of the hasty retreat.

"If you don't shut up," said Arcee, her ripped-off servo lying next to her, "I'm throwing this at you."

"I have to inform you that in my expert medical opinion you should not do that," said Ratchet, and then leaned closer. "However, as your friend, I'd say go for it."

"Please," said Optimus. "Do not."

 

\---

 

"I still wonder, though," said Megatron, some time after the incident, when things have mostly settled down. "How exactly did the medic get out of the cell?"

Soundwave, who was currently lying in stunned bliss on his berth—he finally got Megatron to try out his electrodes and it was worth _every second_ of the wait—blinked.

"You got the confession, of course," Megatron continued, "but what happened afterward?” He frowned. “There's something missing there."

"Megatron: has considered the implications of the Autobot's confession?" said Soundwave, after a few seconds. "The medic: could be lying."

"What do you mean by that?" said Megatron, turning over.

"The mind control devices: could have been already installed in any Decepticon before he confessed. A suggestion: the medic used a sleeper-agent to escape."

"Oh," said Megatron. "That is _diabolical_. Brilliant, Soundwave! But who might have been that agent?"

Soundwave smiled.

("What?" said Starscream hysterically. "Are you glitching? I have no mind control device installed, that is ridiculous! Get your filthy servos off me, you butcher!"

"Sorry, Screamer," said Hook, not even a little bit sorry. He assessed the rows of scalpels by a glance, before settling on one particular favourite of his. "Megatron's orders.")

 

\---

 

"Hey," said Rumble when he finally came back from his assignment, four months after The Incident. "I wrote you a poem."

Soundwave looked at him with suspicion: Rumble was usually as far from a poet as one could get, and has never shown any inclination to immerse himself in the finer arts, but he supposed that even he could change. Why, it would be nice if Rumble could find his way to Megatron by this, two fellow wordsmiths partaking in the art of poetry.

And, in the end, Rumble was gone for a very long time: he deserved to be given the benefit of doubt.

So he nodded.

Rumble smiled, cleared his throat and recited gleefully:

 _"Roses are red_  
_Violets are blue_  
_You are such a nerd_  
_And Megatron is too."_

 

fin.

 


End file.
